All posts in “FRIENDSHIP”




Proverbs 27:17

Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.

Be careful with what you say. A string of words that don’t mean much to you may stick with someone else for a lifetime.

Words are power. They have started wars and they have prevented them. They have destroyed people’s self worth and they have given them courage. Words have the power to alternately build and destroy. The enemy uses what people say to you and about you to knock you down and make you ineffective in building God’s kingdom. Think about it, if someone has repeatedly told you that you don’t matter and never will, how will you have the boldness to go out and make a difference?

But what the enemy destroys God will rebuild, as long as we let him. We need to build others up as often as we can. The world consistently tells us what is wrong with us and what we need to fix. But as Christians, we need to stop those lies before they can worm their way into our heads. Tell people they are worthy, loved, and capable. Speak truth into their lives and they will, in turn, speak truth into yours.

The enemy hates the truth. The more we sharpen ourselves and others into the people that God has made us to be the more the enemy will fight back with lies. But don’t believe them. Find a community of truth speakers who won’t knock you down but will build you up to be the best possible child of God that you can be.

QUESTION 1. Has God ever used someone to tell you something that built you up and gave you boldness? Have you believed the lies of the enemy?
QUESTION 2. How often do you hold back saying something nice to someone for fear of appearing weird?
CHALLENGE: Write down the lies you believe about yourself and then rip them up into little pieces. Then, find a community you can trust and allow them to sharpen you spiritually and emotionally as you sharpen them also.




Matthew 7:7-8

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.”

You are at a church retreat and it is time for worship. The band is excellent, the lights are low, the mood is right, and everyone around you appears to really be getting into the music. But something is wrong; you are feeling nothing right now. In fact, your mind is everywhere but on the worship. Where are you God? you wonder. Why is everyone else experiencing you and I’m here all by myself?

 We have all experienced moments like these, whether on a retreat or just in church. We have all wondered at some point why God isn’t revealing himself to us but he is to everyone else. Maybe, in those moments, we need a perspective change. God could be revealing himself through the friends standing next to us, or through our just listening to the words being sung. It could be anything.

Next time this happens to you, just ask God to show himself to you. That is all you have to do. God wants us to seek after him and he wants us to ask him. Sure, he could answer your prayer without you asking, but he wants you to talk to him. It is so simple. Just ask.

QUESTION 1. Have you ever had a hard time experiencing God while everyone else seemed to be having an easy time of it?
QUESTION 2. How often do you simply ask? Think back, can you even remember the last time you asked God to reveal himself to you?
CHALLENGE: When you are frustrated with God, or can’t feel him near, just ask him to reveal himself. Then be still and wait. God will show up.




John 17:21

“That they may all be one; even as you, Father, are in me and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you sent me.”

There are a lot of us who aren’t very good at letting people into our lives. Sure, we may have tons of friends and hang out a lot, but very few to none know us deeply. You may think that this isn’t an issue and that you can deal with your problems on your own, but that is something that can take you down some dark and dangerous roads.

The Bible says that we were made to live in unity with others and are supposed to lift each other up (Hebrews 10:24). It also tells us in Ecclesiastes 4:10, “Woe to the one who falls and has no one to pick him up.” Do you want to be a person who, when you fail or fall, has no one there to help you back up?

If you’re someone who shuts people out and thinks you can do it all on your own, you must stop. There is so much more strength to be had when you allow someone else to love and help you. Also, take the time and energy to genuinely love someone. This isn’t a one way road. When you begin to lift someone else up, you too will be lifted up. It’s a beautiful exchange.

QUESTION 1. Do you shut others out? Is it hard for you to accept love?
QUESTION 2. Do you love others well? How are you using your gifts and talents to display genuine love to someone?
CHALLENGE: Ask God to help break down your wall and then begin to share your life with others. Put all your hopes, dreams, pain, suffering, and struggles out there and allow others to lift you up and point you back to Jesus.




John 19:25-27

25 Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. 26 When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to her, “Woman, here is your son,” 27 and to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” From that time on, this disciple took her into his home.

 When you think about friendship, what thoughts come into your mind? Let’s take this question one-step deeper. When you think about your closest friends, maybe a best friend, what thoughts come to your mind now?

A close or best friend is trustworthy; you could tell them anything and you could trust that they wouldn’t go around blabbing your secret all over town. A close friend goes out of their way for you and sacrifices their needs for yours. There is no person who showed us what true friendship is more powerfully than Jesus Christ. When Jesus was being crucified, hanging on a cross, bleeding and bruised from the beatings, he still looked beyond his circumstances and took time to minister to and care for his friends. This kind of friendship is a loving friendship that goes very deep. So deep in fact that its depth seems unattainable by any human being. Jesus loved us so much that he gave his life for us and, even while in the process of dying, took time to show his love to his mom and his friend (John 19). We should all follow the example of Jesus Christ and learn what it means to care for others even when caring hurts.

QUESTION 1. Write down all the attributes of a good friend.
QUESTION 2. When you think about your friendships, how do you rate yourself based on the attributes you listed for question 1?
CHALLENGE: We challenge you to be the kind of friend that Jesus calls you to be; that is, being trustworthy and loving and caring for the needs of others even when it hurts.
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